Walk by faith, not by sight

Writing helps me vent. It allows me to relax my mind when its stressing. I know this last blog I wrote wasn't a good one emotionally. That night was depressing. This night is more stressful for me. I have so much going on right now. The other night I was sad because it was evident that I felt lonely. This night I'm just stressed, I'm worried about Christina and Amber, and their family. I'm worried about college work. I'm worried about my grandmom. I'm worried about falling into sin again which was one of my most scariest moments as a Christian. I'm also worried about my brother (Where is he, whats he doing, even worse, is he dead?) I don't know what to do sometimes. I feel like I put the weight of the world on my shoulders, I need to give it to Jesus. I'm not God, far from it, and sometimes I attempt to help more than I can handle...Or maybe I just need more prayer. I really don't even know at the moment.

A lot of these old friends, I miss them in the back of my mind. I also extremely don't. When I see pictures of us all...it makes me so upset. One that I even hung out with them at all in the first place, when I had turned my life to Jesus Christ before that...and secondly, that I've abandoned them all without any mention. Sometimes, I wonder...what exactly is God's plan for me? I know I'm in no authority to ask. Its whatever He wants it to be truthfully. I just wish I knew it was going to turn out alright. Because right now...it feels hopeless.

Like I said in the last blog, I'm lonely. I have no friends, I have nothing except Jesus Christ which I know, He should be everything anyways. It would just be nice to have people in my life to help me with my walk by faith. This leads me into something awesome that happened yesterday. While I was at the DVD rental store on campus, I had picked up this movie and read the description on the back, (I forgot what movie it was), but within the description it had said, "Walk by faith, not by sight" this stuck in my mind for some reason. I then ended up watching two completely different movies from the one that I had picked up. One was the Rundown, and the other was The Book of Eli, both are not Christian movies, The Book of Eli is kinda Christian, but not entirely. Anyways, in both movies, it was said, "walk by faith, not by sight"! I dropped my jaw when I heard this in the second movie, I was already pondering the statement when I heard it the first time, because I had remembered reading it earlier that day...

Anyways, this statement, Walk by Faith, not by sight, is clearly valid to me right now, considering I need to. It will help my worries drain away. It will help me not to care what comes next, as long as I am walking by Faith. Its also scriptural, its in 2 Corinthians 5:7...Praise God for his messages to us. Amen.